Thursday, September 2, 2010

Stopping Time

I wish there was a way to stop time...to make it freeze....

I knew when I got pregnant that this would more than likely be my only one...and when we found out it was our little Nola I knew we wouldn't have anymore. I still haven't had that feeling that I want to have another because its Nola I want to have all over again. I know that makes no sense to any of you I'm sure but...I love her more than I ever thought it was possible to love someone and I hate that she is already 7 months...

I'm a baby person...I want to freeze time right now...I want to freeze the smile that is plastered on her face every minute of every day. I want to freeze how she kicks in so much excitement when we walk in her room to get her from sleeping. I want to freeze how she giggles when I tickle her side. I want to freeze the mad women she has become in her jumparoo, up and down vigerously over and over (its hysterical). I want to freeze how she reaches for my face and brings it closer and I want to freeze how she giggles when swaddled when I kiss her lips.. I love her so much I want her to stay just he way she is.

I tell Jack (even though he already knows) that I don't want to have another baby, I want to have her all over again. She has been such a joy since the moment she joined the world...no colic, no crying spells, no nothing...just all smiles.

Is it terrible to be so sad that she is not always going to be little? I'm tearing up writing this just thinking about it...I know there are joys at each age but I want this age.

I looked at some old videos Jack took of Nola in her first few weeks and months and he squeals etc are the cutest thing ever and I already forgot what she was like somewhat and that was always my biggest fear if you ask him, forgetting.

I'm babbling I know...I don't post as much anymore because all my time when she is up is hers..and when she sleeps, I have to get things done so I am sorry I don't post as much. Anyhow, I just wanted to get that all off my chest.

Here are some recent pictures of my girl!