( Let me just say I am sorry that this is one paragraph - I can not figure out why in my draft is paragraphs but when its publishes its not)
Thank you so much everyone not only for your kind words but for checking up on me since I was to lazy to write a blog entry earlier.
The RE read all our files prior to our meeting so she was well aware of our situation - which isn't much of a situation. So what she said...nothing really that we didn't already know. There is really nothing wrong that she can see. All the tests and blood work etc from Dr.H all look good.
She knew that I also wanted a second opinion on whether or not I should have a Laprascopy...she basically said that if she did the laprascopy on me if she had to guess she wouldn't find much of anything based on all my results etc. She also said the same thing that Dr.H did - if I am going to do IVF then I don't have to have the Laprascopy. She told us all about IVF...She said that I am lucky that I have AGE on my side and that I am still young.
I told her that I was not ready for IVF - she said that was totally fine and that when I am ready I will know. We asked her about more IUI's and she said without drugs we could really do as many as we wanted but with drugs they try and limited how many they do because of all the drugs.
She was really nice and left it up to us to decide what we wanted to do next. We were just hoping for more of an answer I guess - is to what could possibly be wrong but I guess she cant answer that considering nothing really is wrong.
So what we decided to do with her is...on day 1 of AF I will call and set up an appointment for the day 2/3 test - the ones we all have all the time....because she wants to run the tests herself and really look at the ultrasound. She said since their job is only to help people get pregnant she would like to see the tests herself and not just a record of it and also the last time I had all the tests done was May. She also ordered a more formal SA to be done at Jacks convenience. We will then review the results with her and go from there....
When Jack & I left I asked what he thought and he felt the same as me - although good, anti-climatic in the sense that we knew nothing more definitive then when we got there. Then he said that in his gut he really feels that we will be able to get pregnant on our ow. He said it just might take us longer than most. I said if that is truly how you feel and they always say "trust your gut" then that is cool with me. He feels that since we have learned some new things about some things we could have possibly been doing wrong and other contributing factors that once we cut those out maybe it might work. I told him that was fine with me.
SO - last night when we were both finally home to discuss it all....(he had to go to work after our appt) I asked what he wanted to do...and he was all worried about the financials and this new insurance that I found etc...he said we have to cancel me off his insurance within like 4 days....he wants to save that $200/month. So he said its either we jump right to IVF or are you willing to wait a year and try on our own and then when open enrollment comes we can then drop you and do IVF?
I said I really don't want to make that commitment - a year again - that would make it 3 years and that's a long time...so here is what we came up with!
~~We will wait until we get the tests back. Providing they are fine (which she said they probably will be) we will continue to try on our own for 6 months more.
~~ After 6 months if we are not pregnant we decide on another IUI or go to IVF
~~ If IVF we just buy that new insurance for the few months that we are going to IVF cycle. We keep me on his insurance because over the next 6 months well have saved up money to cover the extra $$ for insurance they we will be putting out.
~~ IF we do IVF we made a deal that we would NEVER put more than 2 embryos back in..providing 2 fertilize that is.
We are both VERY happy with our plan - and I feel so much better and relieved that we have a plan in place. A good friend kept telling me to make a plan cause it always helped her and I never really understood until now. I feel like a weight was lifted off.
Now I just have to deal with all the pregnant people around me. I promised that I would let it go....its not going to change anything and its not good for me to have the anxiety - so here i am letting it all go.
Here's to 2009!